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"Somebody Better Dunk It Hard", An ISU Basketball Narrative

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Once upon a time, in the land of Ames, Iowa, there was a basketball team called the Cyclones. And the Cyclones found themselves in a situation where they were playing a winnable game at home. During this game, the players had numerous mental lapses, and dug themselves into a twenty point hole in the first twleve minutes or so of the game. While they were in this hole, some fans left the game. Others could be seen reading their young ones books. Basically everybody was bored.

But then, magic happened, and the Cyclones somehow made it a ball game. Everyone was so excited going into the half, and knowing the first hour they spent at Hilton wasn't a complete waste of time!

But like all good stories, there has to be a bad guy or a monster. In this case, it was the refs. They were evil. Not calling moving screens, and 3 seconds in the key. You know, all of the common calls you see every game.

It was basically a plot against the Cyclones. You see, in the fans' eyes, the refs hate the Cyclones. Oh and no, don't bring up the fact that ISU had less calls go against them (15 fouls against ISU to 21 fouls against OSU), and more FT attempts than the Cowboys (21 ISU vs. 16 for OSU). Just throw that out. The refs hate ISU, regardless of what little "facts" you or I might have.

Ok, back to the story: fast-forward, and we're at a point, where the game was slipping away. We were obviously going to win the game (duh!), but the refs had to step in, and make sure that didn't happen. The monster (the refs) was having his way with the Cyclones.

Frustrated, the fans decided to help the Cyclones come up with a plan. People shouted various things, most of them not making any kind of sense, until I heard a peep.... no a squeal. Yes a squeal! And when I heard it, I thought  "of course. This is what needs to happen to stick it to the refs, the Cowboys, and to win the game... Duh!".

"SOMEBODY BETTER DUNK IT HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

YES! Of course! Why hadn't I thought of that? That was the answer! Dunk the ball hard, and the refs will bow down to us! The dragon will be slayed, and the game would be won! It just made too much sense to NOT work!

And this is where the bad part comes, as you see, this isn't your typical fairytale. It's more of a tragedy, that is the Cyclones basketball season.

Nobody dunked it hard.

The Cyclones lost.

The answer to the problem was so obvious, but unattainable. I'm guessing that from the 12th row of the upper balcony, the players had a hard time hearing what this man said. And really it was too bad, because I would have liked to have seen ISU win the game.

The next day, the fans blamed the loss on things like the refs, but I blame it on the "Dunk it hard" man. Had he been rich, and able to sit in the lower bowl, he would've been able to guide the Cyclones to victory. I can only hope he finds a way to sit closer to the court against A&M.